Monday, October 3, 2011
And earlier that day before/during the biopsy what really made me smile: Valium.
Getting a call from the radiologist that starts off with "I've got great news for you..."
Watching (and re-watching) It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.
Ending the work week by getting a new phone. I finally ditched my EIGHT-year-old phone and got an iPhone. Seriously my old phone wouldn't die, I never replaced the battery and it kept working fine. Okay, so it was only slightly less cumbersome than Maxwell Smart's shoe phone.
Starting the work week with hot chocolate because the temp was in the 40s.
Our little girl is getting better. She has been very sick and lost so much weight but now she's putting the pounds back on and is her sweet self.
Friday, September 16, 2011
I recently went for my mammogram and a week later got the dreaded call that I had to return for more testing because 1) I have dense breasts and 2) there were new images on my screens. Ugh. I asked the woman if I should be concerned. She paused--which automatically made me concerned--and said, "it's not an emergency but they saw something new from your last mammogram. They'll do more images and probably an ultrasound and you'll meet with a radiologist so you'll have an answer before you leave. You're set for next week."
Okay then. I hung up the phone and looked at the six long days on the calendar until the appointment. When I picked up Bug that afternoon, I let him pick out three kinds of cookies at the grocery store. Seriously, THREE. And two bags of Cheetos. He was in heaven and I was in limbo.
Donnie reminded me that I had been called back before due to my "dense" breasts. Good point but it was the "they saw something new" that had me
I told Donnie all I could do at this point was to wear good shoes...shoes that would make me happy. Shoes that I could look at before and after the tech places my right breast in the boobsmashing machine while I have a hospital gown hanging around my waist and a heavy protective apron covering the rest of my girl parts. Shoes, man. That's what I need, good shoes to make me smile. I chose this pair:
So I get to the appointment and before new images are taken, I see my breast on the screen and the tech shows me the small area that's circled. To me it looks just the same as the rest that isn't circled. Actually, it all looked like a satellite image of a storm forming off the coast. Not a named storm, just something tropical that might want to get noticed but not cause damage.
After another photo session with the boobsmasher, I met with the radiologist. She used a few technical words and while I know this isn't what she said, what I heard was "clusterfuck." Then she pointed to a little area on the screen that sort of looked like a Fourth of July sparkler. Blah, blah, blah, more medical talk and then random words were getting caught in my brain: new since your last mammogram, the size of grains of sugar or salt, totally curable. I really focused when she said, "I think you need a biopsy but I think it's benign. I'm very honest with my patients and if I thought there was a concern I would tell you."
The biopsy is done with me lying face down with my boob in a hole and the dr doing the procedure underneath. To me it sounds like I'm a car and she's the mechanic in charge of the tune-up. She suggested I might want a prescription for Valium. It's all going to be done in an hour and I'll have the results in 48 hours.
I'm focusing on her belief that it's benign and thinking I need to go shoe shopping.
Friday, July 29, 2011
the other night when I gave Bug a kiss on his forehead I wondered if I accidentally bathed him using our dog's medicated shampoo instead of people shampoo. Even worse if I didn't, I need to quickly change shampoo choices for the little guy. Seriously, boy and dog should never smell the same--particularly when the boy is clean.
I had a cupcake for breakfast today. How could I not? It was a gift--it's rude to not accept a gift, right?
My kindle and I are becoming very close.
Go to Mamarazzi for more confessions.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
But no, this question came when Bug and I were out for a walk one
"Mommy, did I grow in your tummy?"
I paused (I guess you could say there was a pregnant pause on my part but that's just an odd choice of words for this situation)...
As Bug was balancing on a stone wall, I reminded him that no he didn't grow in my tummy but in another woman's tummy who grew him so he could be part of our family. I used the word adoption and again told the story how we met him in the hospital. The biggest issue his four-year-old self currently has with this?
He doesn't like the part of the story that he was born in Virginia and wants to have been born in Boston or on Cape Cod.
Friday, July 8, 2011
I've been unmotivated to blog lately.
It's pajama day at camp and I hate the thought that Bug is set on wearing his fireman jammies. They're a size too small
I ordered a kindle yesterday and now I'm giddy and hesitant about its arrival. I know I'll continue to read (and smell) actual books that open to show real pages but I wonder if I'll love an e-reader the way everyone says I will...
The countdown to vacation is ON.
While I'm giddy about vacation, I'm also a little hesitant about it. We'll spend a week with Donnie's parents on Cape Cod, which is great but Bug's temper is slightly volatile these days and could create unwanted post July 4th fireworks.
I tend to stress out a little at this time of year...it's time to put together photos of Bug for his birth parents. I'm happy to do it but find it's a bit of a balancing act. The focus, of course, is Bug but I like them to see photos of us as a family as well. This year I think I may include some of his funny observations and maybe a few of his drawings, too.
I had a dream this week that I was dating Nelly.
I was in such a hurry to get ready for work quietly and NOT wake up Bug (who was in our bed) that I scooted out the door at 6am and forgot to put on deodorant. Lovely. CVS, here I come.
I wouldn't mind having a root beer float or a DQ hot fudge sundae for breakfast today.
Visit Mamarazzi for more confessions...
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
If you're playing hide & seek with your mom, it's best to STOP the game and go to the bathroom than poop your pants and be found immediately. Even if your hiding spot is a good one the odor will give you away.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Of course, there are times when I'm not in the mood for his help but last night after his bath and right before bed, it was nice to snuggle up with my little guy on the couch. A word that takes me a couple of seconds to write down can be a couple of minutes (or more) for Bug to complete. I love seeing his big letters in the little squares. If a word has two of the same letter, he'll often use an upper case and a lower case so he doesn't "get bored." Rs are a big challenge for him and they look less like the letter itself and more like something you would see under a microscope in biology class. For now, if I see a clue: 4 across, eight letters, "another word for Mom," I'll immediately put PATIENCE.
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Thursday, April 21, 2011
I--not Bug (so far anyway)--had pink eye this week. It complemented my allergies nicely. The upside: I had a doctor's note forcing me to stay home from work because I was contagious. The downside: our computer crashed while I was home.
Just because Easter is coming I didn't need to look like this...
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Yesterday Bug and I were in the car and saw a woman pushing a stroller. It prompted a chat about Bug as a baby. I told him I always enjoyed putting him in his stroller and going for a walk together. We talked about what a happy little guy he was and how he loved his bottle, his toes and Winnie-the-Pooh. I told him how sometimes he would fall asleep and Vera would hear the lullaby and end up napping next to him so I had two sleeping little ones (yes, she sleeps with her eyes open).
He asked where he was born and I reminded him he was born in Virginia (or as Bug says, "REginia"). He asked if that's where we met him and I said yes (thinking that part of our previous chats may have actually sunk in and stuck with him).
Realizing that his questions were going backwards in time, I geared up for a little deeper conversation and possibly a question that went a step prior to our meeting him and was ready to follow his lead.
And then he said...and when you met me was I already in a stroller ready to go for a walk?
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Often when I pick up Bug at school we'll go to the playground and see children from his class or our next door neighbor may show up
Typically, Bug may go down the slide a couple of times with his friends but then he's happy to dig and create roads in the sand by himself as opposed to playing with the other kids. THIS is a huge improvement from the fall when he would simply dig his fingers into my leg at the playground and hide behind me,
So I was happy that Bug initiated wanting to see Mat.
Until last night...
I had been at an adoption meeting (not for a second child or anything interesting--just a volunteer meeting) and Donnie told me about this conversation with Bug:
Bug: I can't wait to see Mat.
Donnie: Yeah, that will be fun to play with Mat.
Bug: No, I don't want to play with Mat...I want to play with Mat's toys.
When I heard that, I could almost see the autumn leaves and feel a clawing deep in my thigh as if I were back at the playground.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Monday, April 4, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
- Spring arrived before my allergies this year.
- Yesterday Bug was outside for three hours at the playground across the street. Donnie and I tag-teamed but Bug went strong the entire time building a city in the sandbox, watching for pirates from the top of the slide, swinging, kicking the soccer ball, contemplating the story of "The Tortoise and the Hare" and keeping an eye out for "ghostessess." Best part of all was when he came to us an hour before his regular bedtime announcing he was tired from all his work and should go to sleep.
- "Madness" seems the perfect word to describe this year's NCAA tournament. I haven't been able to watch much of it but what I have seen has been fun
even if I have NO teams in the final four.
- I've actually made time for reading...I feel like I've been reunited with a long lost friend.
- In one week our convention will be OVER.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
1) pee pee
2) poo poo
4) pee pee poo poo
5) pee and poop
7) pee pee head
8) caca coocoo
Wait, you're not laughing either? Ah, pre-school humor...
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Bug now calls farts "air poops."
I learned a couple of weeks ago that my job may be further downsized or possibly eliminated. Although if it happens it won't likely happen until July so I have plenty of time to fret over it.
I'm really ready for spring
not so much the allergies that come along with the season though.
We are invited to Donnie's former girlfriend's daughter's wedding (that's a mouthful...there's probably an easier way to phrase that but I can't come up with it). The ex has already invited us to a dinner the night before with family (but not the wedding couple) and a few of her closest friends...the wedding is a few hours away and with babysitting issues, I doubt we'll go to that...just the wedding. I'm trying to prepare myself for awkward moments because I
expect them to know they will happen.
All the thoughts in my head are just snippets of things. Not many things feel connected or finished (like this post, for example).
Bug's been waking up at least twice a night for a few weeks now. It's beyond old at this point. I'm longing for his good sleeping habits to kick in again.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
So I get home and this is the conversation with Bug:
Me: What do you think of my hair?
I'm thinking if he continues with this honesty he won't have many second dates in the years to come.
Monday, February 28, 2011
I would love to find a cozy spot and sneak away (preferably with a book) but I'm pretty sure, just like when I was a little girl, someone would find me.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Next week I'm going to SD to visit my mom. I had hoped to go over the past weekend but flights were too expensive so I booked my trip for early March. I'm rarely thankful for high-priced air travel but in hindsight those elevated rates were a blessing. I avoided the 18 inches of snow that arrived on Saturday. My brother and his wife were back for a visit. He said that the snowdrifts outside his window were taller than him. Good ol' South Dakota...18 inches of snow and their departing flight on Sunday was on time! I think I'll mention that next time someone asks where I'm from.
Meanwhile, I'm going to think good thoughts for warmer weather and less snow next week for my visit.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
I have a gift card and wanted to use it on something that I might not otherwise buy for myself and thought a Kindle would be great...or maybe a Nook. If I traveled more, I'm sure I would have purchased one long ago. I often curse my reading addiction when I'm packing for a trip...three or four books can take up space in a carry-on or tote, weigh the bag down and give me a sore shoulder. But...when I'm lying in bed, do I want to curl up with an e-reader instead of a book?
Any thoughts? Do you have an eReader? Do you love it? Against them altogether? Should I just buy some fabulous shoes instead?!
Monday, February 14, 2011
Friday, February 4, 2011
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
My parents (and sometimes the kids) went to Minneapolis to see a Vikings game once a year. On those times when my parents
I cried myself to sleep that night.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Bug's school was closed for a third day this week (Wed: threat of bad weather, Thur: cleaning up snow; Fri: no heat in the school) so Bug and I had the morning to hang out at the hotel. After showering, roaming the lobby and staring at the fish, making plans to ride the alligator (aka elevator) to the top floor later, we wandered to Starbucks to get hot chocolate.
Happily, we found seats so we could drink our treats and chat. The conversation went like this:
Bug: Oh, she forgot to put pants on...
Me: (not understanding out what he said--asked) What?
Bug: (louder, of course) She forgot to put pants on (pointing now so I could see the woman in a chair near us wearing a short dress and nude hose).
Me: No, she has a dress on, you just can't see it because her coat is covering it.
Bug: (louder, again, of course, because that's what four-year-olds do when they're 100% correct) NOPE, she forgot to put pants on.
Me: Drink up. (As Bug picked up his cup, the pantsless woman got up, pulled down her dress and left Starbucks.)
We're now at home where the heat is on and everyone is wearing pants.
Friday, January 14, 2011
I tip better if a waiter/waitress refers to me as "miss" rather than "ma'am."
I nearly polished off a full bag of frosted animal crackers before Bug knew they were in the house (see top confession above...).
I don't want to change my horoscope sign. I liked being a Libra all these years--balanced yet out of whack.
My mind tells me to exercise but the rest of my body doesn't move.
There are times I really miss the baby stage (as in Bug being a baby...not me). One thing I never miss about babyhood: changing crib sheets.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Friday, January 7, 2011
I hate my new glasses.
Check out other confessions and link up.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Here's our little girl, Miss VeraCora, snuggling up on Bug's Elmo chair. It's cute but the thing you should really notice in the photo is the pirate ship to the right of the chair. Friends gave it to Bug and when he received it, he was told it had 35 million pieces. I put it together and believe that number was fairly accurate. I'm quite pleased with myself (and I don't think it matters at all that I had a few extra pieces when the ship was completed).
Monday, January 3, 2011
I saw this quote on The World According to Curly Girl blog (check it out if you don't know it already) and wanted to share it. Happy new year!